I first heard FOMO used when I was watching Mistresses a few weeks ago. (I haven’t been connected to the latest slang/internet speak in many years).
I always thought I was just a morning person but now I realized I had a serious case of FOMO up until I had kids. I would wake up as soon as the morning light seeps between my curtains. I would immediately spring up from bed, wide awake, and eager to start my day. There’s so much to do, things to see, life to experience!
My mom recently told me, after observing my kids, that they’re just like me when I was a toddler. Apparently I had FOMO for most of my life and passed it on to my kids. And boy do my kids have FOMO. They would fight to stay awake until they nod off standing up.
Since having kids, I don’t really care about missing out on what’s going on in the rest of the world as much as missing out on a few extra minutes of sleep. But as I’m slowly catching up on sleep, I’m starting to feel a little FOMO again…
I realized I never popped in to post Ander’s birth announcement (or pregnancy announcement, or update) so here it is. Better late than never, right?
I, to be completely honest, was not happy with Logan’s newborn pictures. I just didn’t click with the photographer. I shopped around for a new photographer but even those with good reviews have at least a few bad reviews that turned me off. Since I knew I was going to be in the throes of the newborn stage, I didn’t want to risk hiring a photographer who happened to have an off day with us and having to deal with that tension. It seems that as I get older, I expect nothing less then stellar service. And good service is so hard to come by these days.
I came across this post and I was empowered to take Ander’s newborn photos myself. (Hey, if Kate Middleton can do it, then I can too, right?! =P) I couldn’t be happier with my own pictures even though I was limited in props and accessories. Seriously, it was so fun and stress free. There are a lot of posts out there that gives great tips. Hope you’ll give it a try.
As I was trying to put Ander back to sleep this evening, I likened trying to soothe a baby to navigating a minefield. Not that I know what it’s like to navigate a minefield, but it’s what I imagine from what I see on TV (you know, that thing where we apparently learn everything we need to know, plus some).
Anyways, I was rubbing ander’s back as he was drifting back to sleep. I was glad I didn’t have to pick him up this time, then I realized the moment it happened – I messed up the rhythm of my circular rubbing. It was too late because a split second later, he kicked his legs and cried out in angry frustration. Ahh sh*t!!
Right? It’s like navigating a minefield. As you step forward, you knew almost immediately that you made a wrong step. Maybe you can feel something hard underfoot but it’s too late to stop your foot as it comes down and activate the mine… Yea it’s weird how one’s mind works.
Going back to Ander, he was back asleep in just a couple minutes. He’s known as an easy baby by everyone who meets him. The cashier at Target. The server at the restaurant. Other parents at Logan’s school. And he is, in comparison to Logan at the same age. KT and I are so grateful how much easier this infant stage was this time around. It is so true that it is so much better to have a colicky baby-bad sleeper-need to be held 24/7 baby first, and an easier (doesn’t matter to what degree) baby next. It gives us perspective. We’re just constantly grateful that we don’t have to take shift sleeping and holding a baby, or endure hours of crying before, during, and after the witching hours. So grateful that we kinda just grazed over whenever Ander does fuss or spit food in our face or cry in the middle of the night for a solid hour or two before going back to sleep.
But you know, that’s just it – raising an “easy” baby is still hard. It no joke when people say being a mom is the hardest job you can ever do. But it is also oh-so fulfilling. And if there’s any truth to it, it just might be the most fulfilling job I’ll ever do. We are so blessed to have these two little boys. No matter how difficult it might be during any given moment, just remembering how much more difficult it could be really put things into perspective for me. And if that doesn’t work, then you know, have a little melt down/temper tantrum, feel a little silly or guilty cuz they’re just kids, and then take a page out of Logan’s book – forgive and forget.
This listing is for a 3×4 black and white paper pack. You will receive 25 count of 3×4 Pattern Paper. Each pack of 25 will come with various pattern papers that I had hand picked. They are perfect for Project Life pockets or use in any scrapbook pages. These beautiful pattern papers are from the Recollection blackjack collection.
Logan’s first year is one of the best and hardest year of our lives. And I miss it so much. I can’t believe how quickly he’s growing. To celebrate this milestone, we decided to throw Logan a big bash… which really was for the benefit of our family and friends.
This party turned out to be a huge DIY project. I went with a Dr. Seuss red/white/teal theme. I designed the above image for postcard invitations and had them printed from an online shop.
I also decided that it just wouldn’t feel right for the environmentally conscious me to use disposable party goods. I made cloth cocktail napkins with red/white stripes ticking cloth. It turned out to be a huge undertaking because we ended up with 50+ guests. We also used all of our dinner dishware and outdoor dish ware. To minimize the need for utensils, we went with finger food. We made all the food and my family ended up coming over the morning of the party to help prep and cook. And blow up balloons and hang decorations.
To continue with the DIY-focused party, we set up a pizza station so guests can custom make their own personal sized pizza. I pre-made the dough and KT manned the pizza “oven”. Our friend, Brad, jumped in to help and he ended up firing up pizzas with KT during the entire party. Thanks Brad!
My sister made Logan two birthday cakes. We decided to purchase Logan’s smash cake since I didn’t want my sister’s hard work getting obliterated in a matter of minutes. Logan really enjoyed smashing the cake once he got started. I was definitely impressed with how he dug in at the end.
We hired Caricatures By Dominic. We definitely recommend him if anyone is looking for a caricaturist. He’s really personable and everyone liked him. His caricatures were also pretty spot on.
Photo credit: Thank you Robert for all of the wonderful party pictures! We were so busy with our guests that we didn’t take a single picture. I am so grateful my sister had the foresight to suggest that Robert be the designated photographer. We ended up with some really special pictures.
We had a great time celebrating Logan’s big ONE. We are so glad for all of our family and friends who made his day so special.
P.S. We also did a lot of work in the backyard to prep for the party. I’ll write an update for the backyard soon.
We’re already done with half the year but I figure this post is appropriate for my first post back from a long hiatus. It was a couple months into 2015 before I realized I needed to change my one little word for the year.
I had huge plans for this year. It was going to be the year of me. After childbearing and raising a baby for almost two years, I was ready to have my body back. I was ready for some “me” time and focus on my needs. I was more than ready to have more grown up conversations and less baby talk.
But things didn’t quite unfold this way. First off, we found out we were expecting (!!@??!$%!). We were most likely going to have one more kid but definitely not so soon. I was already six weeks along before I figured out we were expecting. So we had to adapt.
Then, KT got a job offer that we couldn’t pass up. We had to make a major change to our schedule because KT could no longer work from home as often. We adapted.
Finally Logan was going to start school (I know right?? Already!?!) And I was going to have at least two months to get ready for the new baby before he arrives. Unfortunately the weekend before his first day of school, I was admitted to the hospital and was treated for preterm labor. Now I’m strictly on bed rest. I missed Logan’s first day of school which was heartbreaking. And KT has to take leave from work to care for both Logan and me.
Talk about having to adapt, right? This has been a year of curve balls and surprisingly, we’re adapting really well. We definitely see the silver lining along the way. Although we have an unexpected pregnancy, it has been a breeze compare to the first pregnancy –even with the all day nausea that lasted well into the second trimester. KT’s new work schedule actually allowed him to be home and present more often than before. And well, with the bed rest, it’s just awfully nice to have KT at home with us for the next few months. KT can get some house projects done while Logan is in school and I can finally catch up on scrapbooking in bed.
I’ll be honest, for the first couple months of the year, I kept thinking “but this was suppose to be my year!”. Once I figured out my one little word should be adapt, it’s been my guiding light and has significantly changed my perspective. This is still my year, just not the way I had planned it.
I’ve mentioned a few times before how I wasn’t sure how I would handle my work schedule when Logan arrives. So it’s no surprise that I got a work email on a Monday after I sent out the announcement email just two days prior when I gave birth, right? Actually, I was floored. I quickly replied that I haven’t been discharged from the hospital yet (duh!) and that I will address the email when I return home. Honestly, this is what I get for even checking my work email at the hospital.
Before I knew it, I was back to work after I was discharged, working after Logan gone down for the night. After six months of working into the early mornings, I was exhausted. By nine months, I was a little resentful of my demanding job and just went offline. I stop checking into work. I was so sick of looking at my computer that I even ambitiously thought I might stop keeping up with my favorite blogs. That didn’t happen but I did manage to check into work only a handful of times the last five months and only dealt with emergency matters. I stopped posting here at the same time and I stopped looking at pinterest. It was my unofficial, unplanned maternity leave, nine months late.
It’s a brand new year and I am feeling refreshed. KT and I talked about my work schedule and we decided that I was only going to work on projects I want. I am going to start saying no. I’m not going to let myself get overworked. I’m going to take care of Logan and make time for myself. I will stop doing brain-numbing work and do more creative work. That leads me to my one little word for this year: Balance. Here’s to a more balanced new year.
Everybody usually wants to hold a baby when they see one right? Except for those people who are afraid of babies, of course. I hear about babies that lets anyone hold them but Logan is not one of them. Just in the last couple months, Logan developed a strong sense of individuality and awareness, which inevitably led to stranger anxiety. I find myself constantly making excuses when he wouldn’t let other people hold him. “He just woke up so give him some time” or “he’s teething so he’s cranky.” Or I’m making suggestions like “just play with him for a while on the floor until he warms up to you.”
Then it finally hits me. Of course you need to give him time to warm up to you! You don’t just invade the personal space of a person you just met, right? You have to build a relationship first. And that’s exactly what Logan needs. So next time instead of getting upset or hurt feelings when babies won’t let you hold them, just playing their favorite games with them and you’ll be halfway there.
This line from Dr. Seuss finally made a lot more sense: A person’s a person no matter how small.
I’ve been sitting in the living room watching Logan play on the floor. It’s been an especially rough day. Logan looked up from his self-appointed job of shredding our junk mail and saw me watching him. He seemed so happy to see me. He excitedly crawled over to me with this huge grin on his face. I picked him up, held him close, and just started sobbing into his little body. He thought I was playing with him and he started laughing. His beautiful baby chuckles. In that instant I was so grateful that my tears did not affect his happy disposition. I can’t help but wish that he’ll never know disappointment or have his heart broken. I won’t be able to shelter him from it forever but for as long as I can, I want to make sure he’ll only cry for a bottle or a nap or a diaper change.
Some days are just easier than others. I’m so glad to be able to stay at home with our little man but lets be honest here. An infant is oh so needy and my patience is tested everyday. The days are usually so monotonous. Babies needs to be constantly entertained but their attention span is that of a gold fish. Then something would happen that makes it all better. He’ll squeal with joy when he sees me and I would feel like I must be doing something right. He’ll feed himself steamed broccoli for lunch and my heart would swell with pride. And at night, when I put him down to sleep and watch his peaceful face, all I can think about is how lucky we are to have such a healthy baby.
Yesterday I was on a work conference call for about half an hour while carrying Logan around. Surprisingly it was a nice break from our typical day of eat, play, and nap.
I didn’t have much of a plan when we decided to start a family. I bet KT is smiling smugly, thinking I never have a plan for anything. In a way I’m a last minute procrastinator who just does whatever feels right at the moment. But then again I often find myself stressing over the smallest details for hours and hours. I’ll have to revisit this self exploration in another post.
As I was saying, I didn’t really have a plan for starting a family. Sure, we talked about “wouldn’t this be great…?” And “I would love to do that…” But nothing concrete. At least not in my head.
For work, my clients would ask when I’m planning on taking my maternity leave and when I expect to be back at work. My response was that I’ll try to work up until I can’t (or don’t feel like) working anymore and then I’ll see how I feel about going back to work after the baby arrives. Not the best answer, eh?
I figured I would have it figured out by the time Logan was two months old. Or at least by the time he’s four months. But we’re going on nine months now and all I want to think about is planning his first birthday and our backyard projects.
I do know one thing for sure. I know what kind of parent I want to be. I think I’ve always known. I’m the mom who will let her kids fall because that’s the best way to learn. I’m the mom who let’s her kid play on the floor, with dirt, dog hair and all. I’ll paint his walls with phrases like “mighty oak from little acorn grows”
But I won’t just be mom, I’ll be me. I’ll go out without them and do things unrelated to them. And when I’m asked if I miss my baby, I’m not afraid to say “no.” Sometimes we just need to get away and be ourselves because being a mom is not what defines me, it’s just a part of me. And as for “the plan,” we’ll just keep taking it one day at a time until it doesn’t work for us anymore.