88 days to go

I’ve been pretty honest here – this hasn’t been easy.  But I want to focus on something positive this morning.  After Monster came into the bedroom just after six this morning, asking for his breakfast, I couldn’t go back to sleep.  I got back into bed and my ribs pinched me (I don’t know how else to explain it).  I winced in pain and KT, still asleep, reached out to hold my hand.

KT has been my support system.  No, it hasn’t been perfect but he makes this easier.   I’m definitely not doing this alone.  There’s been times I felt alone in all this, but he’s been there, doing the dishes and the laundry because I can’t.  Even when I felt too sick to eat, he’s there cooking in case I do have an appetite.  And when I was in tears from back and rib spasms during a Saturday date away from home and refused to go home, he reassured me that the date wasn’t what is important.  He told me that he can’t wait until our baby is here so he can shoulder some of this burden.  That means the world to me.  But he already does and I am so grateful.  He is a wonderful partner.  A wonderful husband.

Sometimes I worry about neglecting Monster and Sugar whenever I’m overwhelmed by this pregnancy but KT fills my shoes perfectly.  I love watching him play fetch with Monster and cuddle with Sugar.  He even plays the way I play with them.  Whenever I start getting frustrated with Monster because he’s scratching me, KT reminds me that Monster doesn’t know his scratching hurts — he’s just saying “Mama, Mama, look at me” with that innocent grin on his face.  Just the way I used to point out a better perspective whenever KT’s patience runs short with them.  He makes a wonderful papa for Monster and Sugar, and he’s going to be a wonderful daddy to this little one.

I am lucky.  I know that.

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