I’ve been sitting in the living room watching Logan play on the floor. It’s been an especially rough day. Logan looked up from his self-appointed job of shredding our junk mail and saw me watching him. He seemed so happy to see me. He excitedly crawled over to me with this huge grin on his face. I picked him up, held him close, and just started sobbing into his little body. He thought I was playing with him and he started laughing. His beautiful baby chuckles. In that instant I was so grateful that my tears did not affect his happy disposition. I can’t help but wish that he’ll never know disappointment or have his heart broken. I won’t be able to shelter him from it forever but for as long as I can, I want to make sure he’ll only cry for a bottle or a nap or a diaper change.
Some days are just easier than others. I’m so glad to be able to stay at home with our little man but lets be honest here. An infant is oh so needy and my patience is tested everyday. The days are usually so monotonous. Babies needs to be constantly entertained but their attention span is that of a gold fish. Then something would happen that makes it all better. He’ll squeal with joy when he sees me and I would feel like I must be doing something right. He’ll feed himself steamed broccoli for lunch and my heart would swell with pride. And at night, when I put him down to sleep and watch his peaceful face, all I can think about is how lucky we are to have such a healthy baby.